Weird, but good

Today I met with my dean to go over her evaluation from me. (This is the one from the disaster of a class that I had last week.) Before the evaluation, I had to fill out several forms, including an evaluation of myself. It was the same evaluation that both my dean and my students filled out as well.

I always have a hard time evaluating myself. I had a hard time giving myself a 5 in most categories because I just don't have that confidence. (There were a few though, where it was easy to do.)

At the meeting today, we went over my dean's scores as well as my students'. Both my dean and my students averaged out to the same number, and it was higher than the grade I gave myself! I couldn't believe it. I read through my dean's comments, and they were all pretty good. The things she said to work on are ones that I have been working on and are a continual struggle for me (such as getting all the papers graded and turned back in a "timely manner"). I've done pretty well the last two quarters though.

It would be interesting to know what her comments/scores would have been had she been there on a better day, one where most of my students were they and participating.

Overall the students' comments were pretty good too. It's funny, but when we went over the one real negative one I told her that I knew who wrote that, and she said the older lady in the front row? Yep, her. (The one who stayed after class last week.)

So the conference I was dreading, turned out to be rather encouraging! What a blessing! I wasn't super worried about my job based on the one evaluation since my dean knows me really well and I stop by to ask her questions/check in on a regular basis, but I was a bit embarrased since I knew that I usually do so much better (and a little concerned because classes are increasingly harder to get).

Thanks to those who prayed! I went into the meeting a lot less stressed than I would have been!